Look , before I begin, I know we are now in the digital society and staying plugged to the Internets at all times is top priority, but does anybody born pre 1995 enjoy a gathering without phones anymore??? I figured that was a resounding no, so now I present my top 5 reasons why social gatherings cannot exist without social media anymore:
- HEY EVERYBODY LOOK HOW COOL I LOOK! (Ron Burgundy voice): Alright so maybe everybody doesn’t have that mentality but every time I’m out at a social function whether it be a bar, club or a house party, everyone 8-10 years ago would look around to interact with people, myself included and want to know who all is in the same proximity as them. The last time I went out and tried to do that same thing, in the year 2015, you look around for the people to interact with, and EVERYBODY was looking down at the bright glowing prism of light that they all had different apps to tell people who WERE NOT in the same place as them that they were having the coolest time ever! Now I understand snapping pictures to show people, but when you’re live tweeting and posting on Facebook like a running diary every 20 seconds, there has to be a realistic ceiling on how much fun you’re ACTUALLY HAVING!
- ADD ME ON SNAPCHAT, PINTEREST, AND MY INSTA!!!: Dead are the days of let me get your phone number (that was the true test of the will of a man) enter the days of going to a party and instead of getting the number to use at a later said date, are now the times of being at a house party, going up to a member of the opposite sex, and asking for their snapchat name before all else!!!! Then the sick twisted post 1995ers want to make it worse by sending a snapchat to said person at the same party the other person IS AT instead of talking FACE TO FACE!!! Sickening I tell you (I’ve seen that happen too by the way, it disgusted me about the future)
- WHEN I SEE YOU ITS “ON SIGHT!!!” KNOW THAT!!: Once again, gone are the days when you see that one person at a social gathering you really don’t like (this is for women AND men now) and you run into them in person and exchange either words or fists. Nope not now; These days you will know that 2 or more people who don’t like each other are at a social gathering and exchanged words that would constitute hand or gun violence as soon as one spots the other, but in 2015 the “twitter fingers” go to work faster than ever and throughout the entire gathering tweets will go back and forth like “Those fuck boys really showed up here? They lucky I ain’t bring my 40” or better yet “Let that mutha fucka come over here by me and he gettin snuffed on sight!” Pitiful is the only word I have for that, but it’s the world we live in, what can I do about it?
- TAKE A SELFIE WITH ME!!! (*Drunk girl voice*): Gone are the days of grainy, flip phone, crappy resolution pictures taken by some rando you don’t know at the party and always messes up the pictures and your friends question how hot the person you took the pic with really was a good riddance to those days!! Now here is the one thing that I agree with. Having a high-resolution camera and the ability to have pictures taken with a front camera was a helpful game changer! Photo bombing other selfies and taking pics with that one person you want to at the gathering have never been easier and then tagging them later on to creep on the rest of their social media accounts are only one click away!!!
- HEY HOW DID THAT GET ON TWITTER, INSTA, SNAPCHAT?!?!: Gone are the days of getting completely trashed and having to live through it with people talking about it forever. Now everybody wants to make Worldstar by someone else’s misfortunes and the first opportunity to put someone on front street at a party chugging an alcoholic beverage and later doing something completely regrettable (mainly females). There is always a camera and a social media website one click away to catch somebody slippin and at every party I’ve been to in college or beyond, when something happens to someone drunk or sown thing of the sort the first thing said is Worldstar and somehow a camera app pulls up faster than a Chris Johnson 40 yard dash time!
That’s all folks!!! You want more??? Drop some comments, likes, and follows!!! Take care